Techno, techno...hey! hey!

These are class...

First, techno version of eSure ad..



Now..everyones favourite, Barry Scott and Cillit Bang



And lastly...Titantic techno remix

$1,000,000 if you help me..

Have you ever received an email stating it will give you a small fortune for allowing, as in Fr.Ted terms, money to "rest" in your bank account?

Ever been asked to assist with the transfer of money from one account, through yours, to charities for which you will be paid?

I think we have all received these at one stage or another and these are all scam emails. Here is a great website showing how you can take up the time of these scammers, or scambait as it is called.

It might just be my new hobby....

Click here to read one of these stories..its great and will take time to get through.

Silly Woman...

Tut, tut, tut..

Golden Eagle..Dinosaur's Next??

News this morning on the RTE website that for the first time since 1910 a baby golden eagle has survived.

The chick hatched in Glenveagh National Park in Donegal.

Will be interesting to see if they can re-establish these and who knows what next?

P.S. Glenveagh is a fantastic place and the scenary is amazing. Absolutely worth a visit if you are ever up that way. Park yourself in Letterkenny and head to Glenveagh early to take it all in. Then have a night out in Letterkenny which is fantastic.

People who are fuckers No.7 - Filippo Inzaghi

Its been a while since I added a fucker to my list but this guy really is one in my book.
Filippo Inzaghi.

I really do hate this fucker and always have. It's not just because he scored the two goals that gave Milan the Champions League against us, but rather I just hate players like him.

A little touch and he dives. He constantly moans and whinges at refs. He celebrates every goal like it's the last thing he will ever do and the way he waves his hands and roads at the goals makes me just want to shove a spear or something down his throat to shut him up.

I dont know of any fans who actually like him and I think he is vastly overrated.

A real fucker in my book.

Election '07 Update 29 May

So, the Election is all over and everyone seems happy.

Twenty is over the moon at the result.

Damien is also delighted with the result.

And me? Well, to be honest I didnt vote. See I am registered to vote at home in Donegal and have never, ever changed it. And as it was on a Thursday I couldnt get home for it and wouldnt have anyways seeing as it was the day after the Champions League Final.

I looked at the election as follows:

- Is there any of the other fuckers that I would trust (maybe that's too strong a word) more than what is in office at present??

The answer was no. Not at all. They are all a self serving shower of fuckers who really dont give an arse about Joe Bloggs. So I decided not to vote. I personally dont think any of them would make this place any better than what we have.

And I suppose my final point is that if I had changed my vote to Cork I wouldnt have voted anyways. Not one of the fuckers came to my house to try and get me to vote for them. Not one. None had a decent local agenda which is important in my eyes.

Sure, tis all over for another year. Roll on Election '08 !

Election '07 Update 21 May - Fine Gael.

There was another flyer through the door at the weekend this one from Fine Gael. This one is from David Stanton.

I have to say I am very disappointed in it. It covers nothing local at all and is basically the general stuff that they are spouting off about in the press and through all other media's. At least the Labour and Sinn Fein one's talk about local issues.

The one thing of interest on it was:
"Your money spent well, by sacking incompetent ministers".

Do they really expect us to believe that they will deem one of their own incompetent and fire them? Really? I think they are talking through their arse to be honest. Now, if they were to say that they will look at the Civil Service and sack people who are incompetent in there then that would be a different story.

Overall, it doesn't really inspire me at all and after the Enda and Bertie debate Fine Gael are going way down in my reckoning.

My questions if I get to ask them.

Election '07 Update 21 May - Fianna Fail

Another Fianna Fail flyer through the door at the weekend this one from Ned O'Keeffe.

Still no details on what they will do locally.

My questions if I get to ask them.

You'll be humming it for weeks

Who remembers this??

If Bertie and Enda were on the same team....

..they would still be fighting about who would be Justin Timberlake.

But alas they are not.

I watched the debate last night and for me, Bertie won hands down. The review on Irish Election shows how divided some people's opinions are. I watched a bit of the Cooper and Hobbs program with Pat Rabbitte and he came across better than Enda.

Overall we gotta really decide if there is a better option out there than what is presently in office and I cant see one (but then again I aint political enough to really follow the whole thing).

Most of these politicians remind me of wild life shows. Animals, showing their plumes or jaws or gills to impress or scare the others. There really isnt much choice.

The one thing I will say is that is Bertie is outted how will Gift Grub survive????

Fluffy things

This is what photocopiers are really for.

How NOT to smuggle drugs.

Ever wondered how long a chicken lives without a head? Well check Mike out.

The Irish Air Force in training.

and finally...

This mum was so concerned with her son's safety that she helped him hold up a jeweller's. Brings a tear to the eye *sob*

Japenese Flash Mob

This is very funny. Japense Flash Mob..

More Irish Rail stupidity

Last Saturday my wife and myself headed into town for a few beverages and some food.

Deciding that we would get the last train home (even after their shit previously) we headed to the train station.

I called my sister (who also experienced their shit) to check the last train time on the timetable she has (Timetable for 2007). It was 10.30pm.

We got to the station at 10.20pm to see on the new board (about fuckin time) that the train to Cobh was at 10.24pm from platform 4. We got our tickets and headed to platform 4. No train.

The train left Kent Station at 10.30pm from Platform 3. Really, what fuckin chance have we got of improving our transport system if we cant even get the times and platforms right of the current services? Probably what happened is that some fucker in a union couldn't change the details as they didn't have the necessary training and would have to be paid more to update it. Cunts.

Best Name for a Band Ever...

This is quite possibly the best name for a band I have ever seen..

"Mary Harney Must Die"

Check them out on Bebo.

Election '07 Update 16 May - Sinn Fein.

Following on from yesterday's post here are the items Sinn Fein are covering locally in Cobh.

Healthcare: Offering free healthcare to call citizens. That would be nice. Also an ambulance station located in Cobh.

Schools: Proper planning and funding for schools. Badly needed as our schools really need looking after.

Garda: Accountable and resources 24 hour presence in rural and urban areas. That would be great if we have enough cops AND they are distributed properly. And not corrupt.

Cork Harbour: Develop Cork harbour. Again, this is badly needed. Personally, Id love a water taxi from Cobh-City like they have in other cities. Or even an hourly ferry from Cobh into the City. All we would have to do is develop a few little marinas up the water with proper shelters. No cars on it mind. It could go the whole way into the docks.

Landslides: Funding and action to prevent landslides. I'd love to know where these take place and from my limited knowledge isn't this because we remove too many trees at once from an area. So, action: stop cutting trees in potential landslide areas. Problem solved.

Peace: Peace strategy to deliver on an Ireland of equals. Back to the old unite Ireland stuff (which I would like to see once we get rid of some folk)

A few nice things there to consider but overall (as with Labour) there is very little commitment in the document. It is more about what they would like to see rather than stating they WILL get it if they are elected.

It is better than Labour's but that aint saying much to be honest.

Put Paris Hilton in Jail

She was driving as follows:

• No headlights on
• With no license
• At 70mph in a 35mph zone
• And allegedly with no insurance
• After having been told not to drive due to previous drink-driving offenses.

Jail the bee-atch.

Sign the petition to send her to prison.

Fluffy things

Drunk man fails driving test.

Truly amazing close up of a sea horse.

Italian parents to drug test their children.

Quick test. See what you are?

Tractor guy..very funny

40,000 blowjobs...I'd vote

I see that Belgian politician Tania Derveaux has offered to give 40,000 blowjobs in return for a vote. Tania is a member of the NEE Party. Here is her statement:

"I am the leading NEE party senate candidate in Belgium. And due to popular demand, I will give 40,000 blowjobs to anyone who requests one on this page.

It started with our response to incredible claims that were made by other parties in Belgium, several parties promised new job opportunities in ridiculous amounts. We responded with a parody campaign for which I posed naked and promised our voters 400.000 new jobs.

This national campaign resulted in international media attention and I received hundreds of e-mails asking for 400,000 blowjobs. If this would get us even more media attention, I'm willing to give 40,000 blowjobs to make the statement.

According to my planning this would take me 500 days to tour around the world, visiting all the ones who signed up for a blowjob on this page, giving 80 blowjobs per day. So the offer is limited, sign up while you still can.

Click the button if you would like me to give you a blowjob.



Note: those who are married or shy can also choose to receive their blowjob in Second Life"

Now, are you going to tell me you wouldn't vote for her???

Election '07 Update 15 May - Sinn Fein.

Last night two lads called around campaigning for the local Sinn Fein candidate Sandra McLellan. Firstly, and this was a big thing for me, they reeked of cigarettes. If people were trying to portray me in a positive light I'm not sure I would want them in that manner.

That aside I thought that it might turn to their policies but instead as they started going on about percentages and the good chance she has to get in I told them I had no vote in Cork and that sent them on their way.

I forgot to take in the flyer to discuss her policies but I will update with it tomorrow.

My questions if I get to ask them.

Election '07 Update 12 May - Fianna Fail.

Flyer through the door on Saturday May 12th. No caller yet.

My questions if I get to ask them.

Election '07 Update 11 May - Labour.

Our local Labour candidate is Cllr. John Mulvihill with Cllr. Sean Sherlock also up for election.

On Friday last, May 11th I saw Mr. Mulvihill around our estate canvassing. When I arrived back at the house there were several people scurrying around the estate and I was handed a flyer asking for John to get my first vote. And that was it. No nothing else.

On Saturday another Labour flyer was thrown through the door but no one called to present themselves or to answer questions.

To be honest if that is what they will do then they may not get much votes.

I had a look at the flyer sent and they seem to think that saying "Cobh needs its on TD" will get them through. I really hope whoever gets in is in because they are the best (which isn't really likely unless my proposal is put through). Their manifesto (or whatever it is called) doesn't really inspire me.

Lots of ideas but there is no commitment anywhere on the document. Here is what is covered in it:

Tourism: Lobbying for the marina is good but maybe rather than lobby see what is holding it up? What's stopping it? Also if you want to have Cobh achieve its potential then remove pay-parking in the town and get the Chamber of Commence to work better with businesses. Too many are closing up recently.

Affordable Housing: I quote: "I propose that measures are put in place to assist young people". How? When? What you going to do? When you get in will you propose and if its shot down what then? "Oh I tried". You really need something stronger there.

Incinerator Threat: OK. No one really wants this and supporting the groups is fine. Will it be visible support or moral support?

Infrastructure: Proposing funding is made available is one thing but you really need to state that you will demand money to upgrade. And you need to be careful about this. Every time there is work being done on the roads they may a fuck up of them and they are usually bumpy after they finish. Also any upgrades will result in delays to traffic. Maybe get it done at night so minimum disruption to traffic?

Emergency Services: An ambulance is essential. In Germany, I think its law that an ambulance cannot be more than 15mins away from people. We are a smaller country and why cant we have something similar. Maybe we don't need one in Cobh but we need more around the area. Again, calling on the HSE is mighty if they will listen.


It truly is a weak flyer with no commitment anywhere and rather just stating what you will propose, rather than what you WILL achieve if you are voted in.

My questions if I get to ask them.

Steve's Election '07 Review - General Comments

As you maybe aware, I really don't like politics or politicians for that matter. However, I am waiting for them to call around to the house to see what they have to say. There are a few things that I would like to address and a few questions that I would like to ask them because, to be honest, what I have heard interests me little.

The removal of stamp duty while being a good idea does fuck all for me at present as I already own a house. With the prices the way they are, I cannot afford to but a bigger one even if I sell my current house. I just couldn't afford the mortgage. But they are doing little for that. Maybe regulate the house market a bit? Why is a three bed house worth circa €180k in 05 but over €300k in 07 with no improvements in schools, infrastructure or amenities near it? What has made that house gone up in price? Fuck all...more control please.

Other than that, the present election items seem to centre around who has the least dirt and who can royally fuck up the others the most. Last man/woman/4-legged beast standing wins.

Just to let you know, I live in Rushbrooke near Cobh town. The roads are shit and other than a bridge and ferry there is no way off the Island. The town really does little for itself and seems hell bent on imploding. Roads are crap and to many empty buildings.

So what I will do is note who calls to the house and what they have to say about my items. I will let you know who calls and their responses. Here is what I will ask:

1) What you are going to do for broadband/connectivity around the area? It took over 3 years to get Rushbrooke exchange enabled and where my house is I can only receive 1 from 7 wireless providers?

2) What you are going to do with the roads and infrastructure? There are a few hundred new houses open in the last 4 years yet the road is bad and access is dangerous. No new pedestrian paths, cycle paths or wider roads have been built and yet traffic, especially lorries and construction vehicles, has increased so more risk. More houses are planned yet no sign of helping with the growing traffic problems on the Island.

3) What you are going to do with public transport. In the 3 years on the island the Cobh-Cork train's timetable has not increased even with the growing number of people living there. I'm not even aware if the bus is running at all as I never see it and if it does it is very infrequent. Why are the prices always rising for a service that is plainly not? Surely this would have been thought about when the planning went through.

4) What are you going to do about the current house market? Any plans to help out more with both current owners and those trying to buy? Anything to help with the rise and rise and rise of interest rates?

5) What you are going to do about the job market? There have been so many jobs lost in Cork over the last few years yet little to replace them? Is Cork dying?

6) What can be done about unions? Why do we all have to suffer because one person decides to down tools? What happens those who call unofficial strikes and they should have not have been called? Is there accountability here? What can be done to prevent this happening again?

7) What can you do about the Civil Service? Delays are all too frequent in those departments. We all know people who work there (and I use work very loosely). There have been stories of people leaving as a snail like pace is adopted but this affects the general public? If someone messes up in the civil service why are they not fired? Why are they just moved?

Eating Out: Nutmeg Restuarant, Cork City

To be honest I can never admit to being a connoisseur of food but I do like my grub. On Saturday last myself and my good lady wife were in town and after a few pints thought it would be good to go somewhere for a nice meal. Following a recommendation from the "laminate menu guardian" we went to Nutmeg which is on French Church Street (between St. Patrick's Street and Paul Street in Cork's city centre).

The restaurant is nice, if a little impersonal. Tables were nice and service was excellent. We did feel, though, it was very open and you couldn't really have a private conversation in the place. Maybe it was just our table.

We were given lovely bread (which is organic and available to buy there) but noticeably no side plates to use. This is a novel way of cutting down on washing costs :) However the bread was very tasty.

For starters we shared baked potato skins with black pudding. There were 5 skins and what seemed like one slice of black pudding shared between said 5 skins. They were nice though and probably filling for one person (but if that person was me or very hungry then I don't think so).

For main's we both had sirloin steak with hand cut fries and pepper sauce. The steak (medium) was cooked to perfection (for me) and the sauce was lovely. The fries, while nice, were a little on the damp side if you know what I mean. Sort of, squidgy rather then "chippy". We also got some boiled potatoes and veg (carrot and cauliflower) to share. Portion's were nice.

We didn't have desert or wine so cannot comment on that.

The serving staff were very friendly and excellent. The one comment I would have is that maybe there was not enough time between courses. We were in and out within 45 mins.

Price was reasonable (between €60 and €70) for dinner.

Overall I probably would go back if we were looking for somewhere with decent food, good service and quick serving but maybe not for a nice long dinner with friends.

Check out the review of the toilet facilities on the "Rate this Toilet" website.

Broadband? What's that?

You may remember me saying a few weeks ago that we would be getting broadband at home very soon. Well that dream didnt last long.

I checked on Eircom's website today and it states that my line is not suitable for broadband. Lovely. Even though the rep that called said they tested this and it was.

We also got a letter telling us that the Universal Account Number we gave was incorrect (ED Note: The rep took down details directly from a bill AND also took the bill header with said details on it. As Damien noted on a previous blog, its always the customer's fault). I did advise the rep that we had instigated the move from Talk-Talk to Perlico a few days previous and she advised that they would sort that out. They didnt. A now Eircom said we have to wait to get the UAN from Perlico, call them and then wait another 25 days from then. This is AFTER already waiting 21 days to hear this!

Customer service? My arse.

I sent them a letter asking them to cancel the order (I will spare ye it). Truly we are lucky to have such incompetent fuckers as our national phone service.

Oh, and one other thing. They can't even get my name right. They had a copy of the bill, my name printed by both myself and the rep and they have my signature and they still had S. Boyne on the letter.

Sweet Jesus how do they stay in business.

Stranger Than Fiction

I watched this movie the other night and have to say I really enjoyed it.

I am a fan of Will Ferrell and really like his humour.

If you haven't seen it yet I recommend getting it...and also go and see Blades of Glory. The last time I laughed so much at a movie was Borat.

Fluffy things

Great comeback line to annoying interviewer

Neighbourhood cleanup....why?

Patrick Moore's views on women in BBC

Yes, its me..

I was accosted in work early Tuesday morn and accused of being a YouTube sensation.

So...yes, this is me.



Thanks Damien.

I was there!

Yes, indeed. I did get a ticket for the Liverpool - Chavski semi-final last Tuesday and what an amazing experience it was.

I had my flights and accomodation booked and was working on every possible avenue to get a ticket. When, on Thursday last I won a ticket on KopTalk. This is an excellent Livepool website and one I would strongly recommend any Liverpool fan to join.

Anywho, the match and atmosphere was amazing. I met and talked with David Pleat (who's prediction of "Liverpool in 90 mins and after that I don't know" came through). Saw Didi Hamann (the real Kaiser), Franz Beckenbauer, Mattias Sammer, Alan Hansen and Alan Smith.

The, ahem, support the Chavs got when they arrived was lovely.

We got into the stadium at about 7pm and already then the atmosphere was building. The singing started around then and literally the noise never stopped until about 20mins after the penalties had finished.

Regardless of what that twat Maureeniho thinks, we were the best side on the night and I can only remember one Chav attempt all night. The abuse for Cashley Cole, Fat Fwank and Dropdownga was a joy to behold.

And then the only thing to make the result better? Yes, the scum were kicked out by Milan. I'm not sure the final will be as exciting as 2005 but you can be sure we will try and make it a good game. Enjoy.